A CHALLENGE TO DECIDE THE CHAMPION

After the chaos at Bricriu’s feast, the question remained—who was the true champion of Ulster, worthy of the champion’s portion?

The warriors Lóegaire Búadach, Conall Cernach, and Cú Chulainn all claimed the honour, but the matter was far from settled. Conchobar mac Nessa, along with his steward Sencha mac Ailella, decided that a fair judgment must be made.

They resolved to take the question to the King of Connacht, Ailill mac Máta, and his wife, Queen Medb, in their stronghold at Cruachán. It would be up to them to decide which warrior was most deserving.

With this, the warriors prepared their chariots and set off for Connacht.

THE RACE TO CRUACHÁN

As they set out, Cú Chulainn told Conall that he should go first because his chariot was so lopsided that its tracks would last for a year!

Annoyed but undeterred, Conall and Lóegaire set off at full speed.

Cú Chulainn, however, stayed behind to amuse the women of Emain Macha. He took their sewing needles and threw them into the air, so that the tip of each needle passed through the eye of the next, joining them together in a row. Then, he gave each woman back her own needle, perfectly threaded as before.

His charioteer, Láeg, grew impatient.

“You squinting fool! They will already be at Cruachán, and the contest will be decided if you don’t move!”

With that, Cú Chulainn leapt onto his chariot and sped off.

THE ARRIVAL IN CRUACHÁN

Cú Chulainn’s horses were the swiftest in Ireland—the Grey of Macha and the Black of Sainglain. Though Conall and Lóegaire were already halfway to Connacht, it was not long before Cú Chulainn caught up with them.

Meanwhile, Queen Medb sat sewing with her ladies when a thunderous sound approached.

She turned to her daughter, Findabair of the Fair Eyebrows, and told her to look out the window.

Findabair described a red-haired warrior with a forked beard, whom Medb recognised as Lóegaire Búadach.

Then she saw another warrior with long, wavy hair—Conall Cernach.

But when she described a dark, sad-eyed man, wrapped in a seven-folded crimson cloak, with seven hero-lights in his eyes, Medb’s face grew pale.

“That is Cú Chulainn,” she said. “If he comes to make war on us, we will be like grain crushed against a millstone.”

Fearing his wrath, she ordered the gates to be opened and instructed her people to greet the Ulstermen with hospitality—some women fully dressed, others in less modest attire, all bearing food and drink.

If the warriors came seeking battle, then meeting them with kindness would be the wisest course.

A ROYAL WELCOME

When the Ulstermen arrived, they were bathed, fed, and given fine quarters.

Queen Medb asked whether they preferred to stay together in one house or separately.

They chose to stay apart, and soon after, King Ailill and the rest of the Red Branch warriors arrived.

For three days and three nights, the Ulstermen were entertained with lavish feasts.

Finally, on the third night, Ailill turned to Conchobar and asked:

“What is the purpose of your visit?”

Conchobar explained that only Ailill could fairly judge which of his three warriors deserved the champion’s portion.

Ailill grumbled at being given such a difficult task but agreed.

“It will take me three days and three nights to decide,” he declared.

The Ulstermen returned home, leaving Cú Chulainn, Lóegaire, and Conall behind to await the judgment.

THE TEST OF THE THREE CATS

As soon as they had left, Medb set her own plan in motion.

She opened the side of a nearby fairy mound, releasing three monstrous cat-like creatures, and sent them straight to the warriors’ houses.

When Lóegaire and Conall saw the monstrous cats stalking towards them, they leapt into the rafters and stayed there all night, watching as the creatures devoured their food and tore apart their rooms.

But when Cú Chulainn saw his monster, he struck it on the head with his sword—only for the blade to bounce off as if striking stone.

Realising brute force would not work, he locked eyes with the creature.

Neither warrior nor beast blinked until morning, when the cats returned to their mound.

THE CHAMPION’S SECRET GIFTS

The next day, Lóegaire and Conall protested.

“This is not the kind of contest we expected! We fight men, not monsters!”

Medb turned to Ailill and said:

“The difference between Lóegaire and Conall is the difference between bronze and silver. But the difference between Conall and Cú Chulainn is the difference between silver and red gold. There is no contest at all.”

Still, Ailill was reluctant to declare a winner.

“If I name one of them the champion, the others will surely turn against me.”

Medb had a solution.

She called Lóegaire first, praised his great feats, and handed him a bronze cup with a small silver bird at the bottom.

“When the champion’s portion is given in Ulster, produce this cup as proof of your victory,” she said.

Lóegaire left, pleased with himself.

Next, she called Conall and gave him a silver cup with a red-gold bird at the bottom, telling him the same thing.

Finally, she summoned Cú Chulainn and gave him a cup of red gold, with a jewelled bird at the bottom.

THE FINAL CONTEST

As the warriors prepared to leave, they saw the youths of Cruachán performing the wheel-feat.

They took a chariot wheel and threw it into the air, competing to see who could throw it the highest.

Lóegaire went first, throwing the wheel only halfway up the wall. He thought the jeers of the crowd were cheers.

Conall threw it as high as the roof beam, and again, the crowd mocked him, though he mistook it for applause.

Then, Cú Chulainn stepped forward.

He flung the wheel high into the sky and caught it again as it fell, to thunderous cheers.

But to Cú Chulainn, it sounded as though they were mocking him.

THE RETURN TO ULSTER

When the warriors returned to Ulster, they gathered for a feast.

Lóegaire proudly presented his bronze cup, claiming that Queen Medb had declared him the champion.

But then Conall produced his silver cup, and the two began to argue.

Finally, Cú Chulainn placed his red-gold cup before them, the jeweled bird gleaming at its base.

Lóegaire, furious, accused him of buying his prize, and the warriors nearly came to blows again.

Once more, Sencha had to separate them, this time sending them to the house of Cú Roí mac Dáire—a wise man whose judgment no one could question.

The contest was still not over.

But that is a tale for another time.